How can I talk to my child about body safety without scaring them?

PROBLEM: “How can I talk to my child about body safety without scaring them?” This is one of the most asked questions on the internet by parents who want to talk to their children about body safety. This concern reflects the delicate balance parents seek between educating their children and protecting their innocence.

SOLUTION:
This post offers a guide on how to approach conversations about body safety with children.
Additionally, the post introduces the “My Body Is My Body” (MBIMB) programme as an effective tool to aid parents in these conversations. By utilising engaging music and animations, MBIMB makes it easier for parents to teach body safety in a way that is both informative and enjoyable for children. The availability of resources in multiple languages and the free access to these materials further support parents in educating their children comprehensively and consistently.
By addressing these concerns and providing accessible, practical solutions, this post empowers parents to confidently educate their children about body safety, thereby enhancing the overall safety and well-being of children.
“How do I start the conversation about body safety with my child?”
The best approach for teaching children about body safety is to use simple, clear language that children can easily understand. Avoid complex terms that might confuse them. By using the “My Body is My Body” (MBIMB) programme you can use it’s simple song and lessons to teach children about private parts, aiming to empower them with the knowledge to recognise and assert their personal boundaries. Here’s a more detailed look into the key elements of this lesson:
How to Talk to Your Child About Private Parts
Explaining the concept of private parts and appropriate touching to your child can be done in a straightforward and reassuring way. Here’s how you can approach this important conversation:
How can I talk to my child about body safety without scaring them -Understanding Private Parts
Start by explaining to your child that their body belongs to them and they have parts of their that are private. You can say something like, “The parts of your body that are covered by your swimsuit or underwear are private. These parts are not for everyone to see or touch.” When teaching children about body safety, it is best practice to use the correct terminology for private parts, such as “vagina” and “penis.” Using accurate terms helps children communicate clearly and confidently about their bodies, reduces confusion, and supports their understanding of personal boundaries and safety. This approach fosters a healthy, respectful attitude towards their own and others’ bodies.
Appropriate Touching
Daily Care: Explain that sometimes, parents or caregivers might need to help them with bathing, dressing, or applying medicine. These touches are necessary and are done to take care of their health and hygiene. You might say, “When Mommy or Daddy helps you take a bath or puts on lotion, it’s because we need to keep you clean and healthy.”
Doctor Visits: Discuss how doctors and nurses might need to check their bodies to ensure they are healthy. Make it clear that these checks should only happen when a parent or trusted adult is present. You can explain, “Sometimes the doctor needs to check all parts of your body to make sure you’re healthy. But Mommy or Daddy or your Carer will always be there with you.”
Consent and Comfort:
Emphasize that even when these appropriate touches happen, it’s important that the child feels comfortable and understands why it’s happening. Reinforce that they have the right to say “no” if they ever feel uncomfortable. You might say, “It’s okay to tell us if you ever feel uncomfortable, even if it’s Mommy, Daddy, or the doctor.”
Provide examples and scenarios to help them understand. For instance, “If anyone tries to touch your private parts, you should say ‘no’ and tell me or trusted adult.”
Empowering to Say No
Right to Refuse: Teach your child that they have the right to say “no” to any touch that makes them feel uncomfortable, regardless of who it is. Practice this with them by role-playing different scenarios. You could say, “If anyone tries to touch you in a way that makes you feel uncomfortable, (this includes, hugs, kisses and tickling) you can say ‘no’ very loudly and find an adult you trust to tell.”
Encourage your child to practice saying “No” loudly and clearly. Have them shout it out on their own to build confidence and assertiveness. This practice helps them feel empowered to use their voice in situations where they need to assert their personal boundaries.
Telling a Trusted Adult
Identifying Trusted Adults: Help your child identify trusted adults they can go to if they feel uncomfortable. This can include parents, grandparents, teachers, or family friends. You can tell them, “If something happens that makes you feel uncomfortable, you should tell Mommy, Daddy, or another grown-up you trust right away.”
Encouragement to Speak Up: Reinforce the importance of speaking up and reassure them that they will not get in trouble for telling an adult about something that made them feel uncomfortable. You can reassure them by saying, “It’s very important to tell someone if you feel uncomfortable. You won’t be in trouble, and we will help you.” This will empower children and give them the confidence to seek help when needed.
Using the MBIMB Programme
Consider using resources like the “My Body is My Body” (MBIMB) programme to help with these conversations. The MBIMB programme uses songs and animations to teach children about body safety in an engaging and non-threatening way. These tools can make the conversation easier and more memorable for your child.
For more information and to access these resources, visit the MBIMB website. By using these strategies, you can effectively teach your child about body safety, helping them understand their rights and how to protect themselves from inappropriate behaviour.
Other Conversations You Can Have Using the 5 Other My Body is My Body Programme Songs
The “My Body is My Body” (MBIMB) programme includes several songs designed to teach children about body safety, consent, and how to protect themselves from abuse. Here are some key conversations parents can have with their children based on these songs:
Song 2: “If It Doesn’t Feel Right – Don’t Do It”
• Conversation Topic: Listening to Feelings and Resisting Peer Pressure
• Discussion Points:
1. Explain to your child the importance of trusting their feelings and instincts. If something doesn’t feel right, it probably isn’t.
2. Discuss scenarios where they might feel pressured by peers to do something they are uncomfortable with, and practice ways to say “no” firmly.
3. Reinforce that it’s okay to stand up for themselves and that they should always tell a trusted adult if they feel pressured or unsafe.

Song 3: “The What If Game”
• Conversation Topic: Responding to Potentially Dangerous Situations
• Discussion Points:
1. Play the “What If” game to teach your child how to respond to various unsafe situations. For example, “What if someone you don’t know offers you a ride home?” or “What if a friend’s older sibling asks you to keep a secret?”
2. Encourage your child to think through their actions and responses in these situations.
3. Emphasize the importance of telling a trusted adult if something feels wrong.
Song 4: “If You’ve Got a Problem”
• Conversation Topic: Telling a Trusted Adult About Problems
• Discussion Points:
1. Talk about identifying trusted adults in their life whom they can go to if they have a problem or feel unsafe. This can include parents, teachers, grandparents, or close family friends.
2. Discuss the importance of persisting until someone listens and takes their concerns seriously.
3. Reassure them that they will not get in trouble for speaking up about anything that makes them feel uncomfortable or scared.
Song 5: “Love is Gentle”
• Conversation Topic: Understanding What Love Is
• Discussion Points:
1. Explain to your child that true love is gentle, kind, and respectful.
It should never make them feel uncomfortable or scared.
2. Talk about what positive, caring relationships look like, and give examples of gentle and respectful behaviour.
Song 6: “Say No to Secrets”
• Conversation Topic: The Difference Between Secrets and Surprises
• Discussion Points:
1. Explain the difference between secrets (which can be harmful and should never be kept) and surprises (which are temporary and meant to be happy).
2. Discuss scenarios where someone might ask them to keep a secret, especially if it involves inappropriate behaviour, and emphasize the importance of telling a trusted adult immediately.
3. Reinforce that it’s never okay for someone to ask them to keep a secret about touching, hurting or anything that makes them feel uncomfortable.
These conversations, inspired by the MBIMB programme songs, can help parents teach their children about body safety in an engaging and memorable way. For more detailed information and resources, parents can visit the MBIMB website.
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